Extraordinarily wealthy human person Mike Bloomberg has no use for Nevada. He doesn’t care about Iowa, New Hampshire or South Carolina either. Trying to win the presidency by building support in those early states, well, that’s for the little people, like U.S. senators and former vice presidents. That’s for people who aren’t Mike Bloomberg.
Bloomberg instead has decided to magnanimously grace the American electorate with his magnificence by running a national campaign for president, and heading straight for Super Tuesday, where his ability to spend jillions of his very own American dollars will allow him to tell everyone how lucky they are that he, the great Mike Bloomberg, is willing to take time out of his busy billionaire schedule to be their president, so vote for him.
Under inexplicably billionaire-friendly new rules announced by the Democratic National Committee Friday, candidates no longer have to show any grassroots financial support in the form of donations from, you know, people. This is big news for Bloomberg’s campaign, which effectively has only a single, sole, solitary donor: Mike Bloomberg.
All Bloomberg has to do is hit double digits in four national polls, or 12 percent in two polls of Nevada or South Carolina, and he will qualify for the Feb. 19 Nevada presidential debate in Las Vegas.
In other words, if Bloomberg can spend enough money to make one out of ten people surveyed who haven’t really been paying attention tell some pollster “hmm I sort of like that Mike Bloomberg guy’s ads,” the Nevada debate would include a candidate who is not even on the list of candidates Nevadans can choose in the caucus.
And Bloomberg would have to come to Nevada anyway. Poor Mike Bloomberg.